How NOT to get picked, on an online dating site.
Posted by nolalou on June 17, 2008
My friend “Dumass”, those familiar with my site know who that is, has been meeting some “nice” women on-line. Now keep in mind that the word nice means different things to different people, VERY DIFFERENT I might add to some people. He has been bugging me to get on line and find me a woman, you see I’m not getting any younger according to some. I beg to differ i am getting not younger. See drinking makes better everything. EXCEPT on-line dating. I logged onto one of the free sites, in hind sight the fact that it was a free site should have been a dire omen.
If you want me to pick you from this site here are a few tips:
1. Do not put a picture of you in a brides maid gown, I thought most women realized by now that they are designed to make you look so hideous so as not to distract from the bride.
2. And for god’s sake do not put your wedding picture on line as your main image. Everyone knows you paid 37 people to work you over for that one day. I’m not expecting Julia Roberts, but you must be hiding something.
3. Do not put an obviously torn picture of you with some guy you broke up with, you are either trying to piss him off or make him jealous, in either case you are not date-able.
4. If you are a “bbw”, i think it means big busted woman or big beautiful woman or something like that. It really means fat. Don’t put a picture of you in a bikini, I’m not opposed to dating you, i just don’t want my friends to see you in the light.
5. NO pictures of you WITH other guys, i don’t want to see them, i want to see you.
6. Bad hair days are not good picture day’s, maybe you were in a hurry to put up a picture, comb your hair and find a friend with a camera-phone.
7. OH MY GOD!!!….. No drivers license pictures.
8. If the picture is so blurry that i wouldn’t recognize you in a room by yourself, see an eye doctor. Bad pictures tell me you have no friends to ask “is this a good picture of me or not”.
9. Please, no stupid expressions like sticking your tongue out like Keith Richards. Not a good look for a woman. And if your makeup looks like Keith Richards or Meme Bobeck expect few e-mails.
I’ll have more later!
This entry was posted on June 17, 2008 at 2:29 pm and is filed under Funny Observations, Social Issues. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
